Sunday, August 27, 2006

The more thrilling adventures of H.H.Asquith and Sir Edward Grey, the Boy Wonder

From the "St. Lone Ranger's Day Special," June 1994.

Austen Chamberlain
The story so far: 6 o'clock was cocktail time. Sure enough, one came through the window. "Holy Agadir, H.H., Prince Kropotkin's very punctual today," said the Boy Wonder. "Ah, Miss Violet, you have broken my heart in seventeen places, including Shepherd's Bush," observed the Prince of PMs. "I think I'll have to brush up my French," said Ll.G. "Things are getting touchy in the Channel." "I think we need to think about inflation; time was, you could set fire to a small country and still get change from a penny. So much for the Licensing Act," muttered H.H. as he slid to the floor. "Mine's a small one but it still fits in the envelope!"

The Queen of Moston

Part sixteen of our thrilling chronicle, continued from page 6

bath time once again and Buffy and Teddy take the opportunity to play with their full-size models of the German South Atlantic Fleet. In next to no time the Bismark has been tackled and Matron joins in the good clean fun.

"Well, you know, some of us know some very important people, we're not all just tat you know, oh no, I knew that Lord Byron you know, mm, that's right, well, I never met him, but I saw a book of his in a bookshop once, well, I was told about the bookshop, it was next to a cottage I went to once when I was just going to see my friend the butcher boy, ooh no, he's in the recreation department, he's just a bit butcher than a lot of the old queens you see on the stamps, well he'd had a row with his boss, the Supernintendo, no, not Lord Byron, though he was a nice old doll, he left me some chocolate biscuits you know, are you listening to me?

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